Who comes to mind when you hear the word ATTRACTIVE?  Who comes to mind when you hear the word KIND?  Who comes to mind when the word ENCOURAGER?  How about INTENTIONAL or LISTENER. One who makes you feel CARED FOR?

Do you have somebody?

I do.  Her name is Teri.  She is attractive in so many ways, encouraging to the core, intentional in her listening and caring beyond what I deserve.

She is my wife and the one who has modeled whole watering can idea more than anyone I know.

We’ve been married 32 years now.  The years have been kinder to her than they have to me.  But she has been kinder to her years and that has contributed significantly, I suppose.  She is more reserved, I am more outgoing.  She is strong yet tender. She loves fiercely and believes deeply.

Teri received a note from a friend last week.  It moved me, literally, to tears.  I was so glad that she had received the card and, more so, that I had married such a woman.  I’d like to quote a few lines from it.


I just want to say thanks for being such a woman of encouragement to me.  I so appreciate that every time I see you, you take time to genuinely ask how I’m doing.  Your intentional questions and intentional listening make me feel truly cared for.  Thanks for being an example of the kind of woman I want to be, always saying, “There you are!” instead of “Here I am!”…

There you are instead of Here I am.  Wow!


People who know that others need to be noted, seen and known are attractive.  People who move toward the lives of others are acting out kindness and encouragement.  People who intentionally listen as the primary means of caring for them are worthy of high praise.


If you, like me, have to work for a living (or spend time in some sort of organizational system) you know that life can be a grind.  You have stuff to do and it needs to be done on a timeline, with efficiency, effectiveness, with excellence, etc.  These metrics are perfectly normal and part of our everyday life.  We should expect them.


But we’d be wise to take to heart the impact of a simple note of encouragement like the one I got to share with you above.  That note, written by her friend, changed this boy’s life!  Disclaimer: I know, I shouldn’t read her mail but it was sitting out and so I just read it…



The “there you are” people notice others, not for what they do, but because they have value simply because they are.  They find us and they water us with their lives of listening, encouragement, time spent, etc.  They talk less and listen more.  They grieve with us when we grieve and weep with us when we weep, yet they are not surprised by joy when it comes.  And so they wait with us, in faith.


Watering Can people, watering the soil of our souls with gentleness, kindness, patience
and care, believing that as they pour themselves out softly on our lives, growth will come and we will bear fruit.  And as we grow and become who we were made to be, they lovingly notice us becoming all we were meant to be and softly say “There You Are”.


Thank you to the kind souls whose lives are vessels full of the needed life to pour onto thirsty world.


Who is your There You Are friend?  I encourage you take the time to send a card of encouragement or give them a call.

Give back a little of what they’ve given to you.

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